In this raw and unpredictable world, we all have the desperate need to feel in control of our own lives. To feel as if we have made a choice in all the major and minor decisions – where we live, what we eat, who we spend time with, what we do each day, our jobs, how much money we have. These things are generally within our control – the outcomes, however much we like them or not, are a result of our own decisions. They are within our power to change.
Some of us need to have a stronger grip of control than others. We are so-called “control freaks”, wanting to decide everything, demanding it all go our way and our way only. We get upset when the decision is out of our hands. We get frustrated when things are left up to chance because we feel that having control is power.
This is not necessarily true.
We crave control because we are afraid of what would happen if we let the universe decide for us. We think we are the only ones capable of making the right decisions; leaving things up to someone else or to fate means bad things will happen. We believe that we always have to know the answers to everything; that we must plan for every eventuality, and if we don’t then we won’t be able to cope with the outcome. We become so overstressed with the need to manage the future that we miss the present.
Ironically, being so focused and stressed in this need actually makes us feel less in control and become less productive. We cannot control everything; every detail, every outcome. Life doesn’t work like that. There are too many variables involved, and some things are just completely out of our hands. Obsessing over things we cannot control just means that we aren’t focusing on the things we can. So we get stressed, overwhelmed. We panic, stop moving forward. We feel helpless and lost.
What we need is to learn to have a little faith. Faith in what we can’t see; belief in the invisible. Faith that some things are just going to work out whether we are in control of them or not.
Having faith is having belief in the bigger picture that sometimes doesn’t make sense. But life doesn’t have to make sense all the time. You don’t have to always have all the pieces to see the completed puzzle. You don’t have to see the entire mountaintop from where you are to know there’s a greater view at the top.
Sometimes we can’t see it at first – the reason things happen a certain way. Those of us needing to have total control resist whatever doesn’t align with our preconceived ideas of what we think should happen. But we need to let go of these ideas. We need to have faith that whatever does happen is what’s meant to happen. That there is value in the experience. That perhaps rather than what we want, this instead is precisely what we need.
When we are trying to control every outcome, we spread our focus thin and don’t give enough attention to what we can control. Letting go of the things you can’t predict or can’t change, surrendering yourself to the natural flow of the universe, will give you more energy to direct towards the things you can. Relax. Have faith, surrender yourself to the current and let it take you where you need to go. You will feel relief, freedom, peace. Only then will your mind not be cluttered with unnecessary thoughts and anxieties. Only then will you see things clearer, have a better view of the bigger picture.
We tend to think of surrender as giving up, relinquishing our power to someone or something else. But it’s not; this increased focus will give you the freedom to put all of your effort wholeheartedly into the things that you desire, allowing you to achieve amazing results. Rather than taking away our power, surrender gives us more power to achieve our desires, to reach the top.
Let go of the fear. Close your eyes, breathe, and jump out of that plane. Surrender yourself to the faith that your parachute will open. Feel the pure freedom and peace as you fly through the air into the exciting, unknown, amazing experience that lies ahead.
Let go and have a little faith.